Expectations after turning 40

Expectations after turning 40

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Women have 4 types of showers Where do spiders go shopping? On The Web Trick Or Treat She's the neighborhood cat lady Happy Halloween: One cannot start Halloween without coffee! Trying to find you some...coffee! Women are Angels, and when someone breaks our wing, we simply fly on a broomstick. We are flexible like that! Why, Yes! I can drive a stick! Why do Mummies have problems keeping friends? What kind of shoes do Ghosts wear? They're creepy and kooky, mysterious and spooky! They are altogether ooky. My facebook family! Why do mummies have problems keeping friends? Why was the Mummy so tense?! What kind of mistakes do Ghost make? What do you call a witch on a beach? A Sand witch Told my supervisor that I'm coming to work on Halloween as a ghost If you want to lose weight you don't need exercise or diet. I won't tell anyone I won the lottery but there will be hints It's another day in paradise, minus the paradise. When you take 17 selfies and still look like this My dad made this for when his girlfriend won't pick a restaurant My toxic trait is telling people I'm down for anything. I'm just sitting here with my onion rings How often do you exercise? Laugh Until You’re Spooked: 10 Funny Halloween Memes You’ll Love 10 Epic Memes to Make You Laugh Out Loud (Seriously, You Might Snort!) That "no work tomorrow" sleep be hitting different The idea of being able to sleep in on your day off sounds great until your body naturally just wakes you up early anyway How single are you right now? Me after arguing with the whole house When you're ready for Fall but wake up to another hot day Me watching Halloween for the 34677496 time. Me when I smell pumpkin spice When someone says you look like you already have plans for Halloween $100 on groceries, $1000 on Halloween Me and my homies in October
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