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The first thing I do when I wake up is try to sleep again
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My sister when she need something vs my sister most of the time
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In my family, if you're normal then you're adopted.
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If you want to change the world, do it while you're single.
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I'm not short. I'm just compact and ridiculously adorable
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I don't like to think before I speak.
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if you could read my mind. You'd back away slowly then run for your life!!
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My alone time is for your own safety!
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Rivers never go reverse.
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My money just waves goodbye
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When you're in a restaurant and you see your food coming
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Hello! You've reached my profile
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The love between Mother & daughter is forever!
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I'm so glad friends don't come with price tags.
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I recently applied for a part time job at a mental hospital.
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I love how in scary movies, the person yells out, "Hello?"
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Being an adult is the dumbest thing I have ever done.
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You know why you like me? Because you are freaking crazy too
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My attitude is based on how you treat me.
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Life could be worse. Milk could have pulp.
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I do not snore! I just dreams I'm a motorcycle
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I don't mind and you don't matter.
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Why is it that the one who snores always goes to sleep first!
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Being a baby must be traumatizing at times.
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Don't be too hard on yourself.
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If you have the power to make someone happy, do it.

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