Similar to Lies I Tell Myself

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Mike-Ross
Alright, who left the bag of idiots open.
Mike-Ross
Which minion mood are you feeling today?
- quotes
- mood
- minion
- minion quotes
Mike-Ross
Always remember these 2 words: they will open all the doors of life. Push and pull
Mike-Ross
The 5 second rule for food
Mike-Ross
The older you get, the more dangerous it is to sneeze!
Mike-Ross
I saw people through the window today
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
She's my bestfriend
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- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
I wonder how cops on bikes arrest people?
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- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
The first thing I do when I wake up is try to sleep again
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- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
Nothing is impossible with the right attitude and a hammer
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- minion
Mike-Ross
7 Happiness Tips
Mike-Ross
I started the week with a big box of patience. The box is empty now
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- minion
Mike-Ross
My holiday equals...
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
The real definition of "Never mind" is "You shouldn't listened the first time"
Mike-Ross
I don't know how exactly when the UFO landed & dumped off all these stupid people
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
kylesportsman
Best Feeling Ever
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- humor
- minion
- minions
kylesportsman
My sister when she need something vs my sister most of the time
RoseKiss
I'm weird! But I know you love me
RoseKiss
In my family, if you're normal then you're adopted.
- life quotes
- quotes
- family
- minion
RoseKiss
If you want to change the world, do it while you're single.
RoseKiss
I'm not short. I'm just compact and ridiculously adorable
Mike-Ross
I don't like to think before I speak.
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
if you could read my mind. You'd back away slowly then run for your life!!
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- minion
Mike-Ross
Having a rough day?
Mike-Ross
You can't choose your family but you can ignore their phone calls
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
My alone time is for your own safety!
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
Rivers never go reverse.
Mike-Ross
My bed is a magical place
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- minion
Mike-Ross
My money just waves goodbye
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
When you're in a restaurant and you see your food coming
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- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
Hello! You've reached my profile
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
The love between Mother & daughter is forever!
Mike-Ross
I'm so glad friends don't come with price tags.
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
You don't have to be crazy to hang out with me
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
I recently applied for a part time job at a mental hospital.
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- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
I love how in scary movies, the person yells out, "Hello?"
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
Being an adult is the dumbest thing I have ever done.
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
You know why you like me? Because you are freaking crazy too
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- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
Sometimes I just wish I had the wisdom of a 90 year old, the body of a 20 year old and the energy of a 3 year old
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- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
My secret talent
- funny
- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
My attitude is based on how you treat me.
Mike-Ross
The one who laughs last, didn't get the joke.
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- quotes
- humor
- minion
Mike-Ross
Breaking News! I don't care
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- quotes
- humor
- minion quotes
Mike-Ross
Life could be worse. Milk could have pulp.
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- quotes
- humor
- minion quotes
Mike-Ross
I do not snore! I just dreams I'm a motorcycle
kylesportsman
I don't mind and you don't matter.
FoxIsHere
Why is it that the one who snores always goes to sleep first!
Mike-Ross
I wanna be like a caterpillar, eat a lot, sleep loads and then wake up beautiful
- funny
- quotes
- humor
- minion

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