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RonnySteel
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A man who cooks is attractive. A man who does the dishes is irresistible
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If you have kids...this collection is called "Not mine"
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I'm old enough to remember when a wild night out meant skating around in circles while a DJ played music
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Today, year olds are asking for the latest iPhone. When I was , I felt like id won the lottery if i had this pen
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One minute you're young and fun and the next minute you predict the weather with your bad knee
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Anyone still shut off lights when leaving a room because their parents used to say "don't waste electricity"?
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timboss
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timboss
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If a time traveller hasn't come back to stop me from what I'm doing then maybe what I'm doing isn't that bad
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daisydoll
Your next task is to eat without watching youtube
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I may look normal but I unfriend people for no reason
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kylesportsman
Keep your relationship private so you can have two
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When your best friend motivates you
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kylesportsman
Me trying to think of a way to not go to the thing i just committed to 30 seconds ago.
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My relationship is so private, my partner doesn't even know I exist
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How my love life is going
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Class is cancelled - These three words are better than I love you
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I hate when some website asks me "Are you human?"
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I have no many responsibilities
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People can't use you if you are useless
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If you are gonna talk behind my back, at least invite me, I hate that person too
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When you accidentally send a screenshot to the person you screenshotted
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Rule no. 1, never trust how you feel about your life after 9pm
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When your alarm goes off and you start wondering if your job is really worth it.
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When you tell someone you're broke and they try to comfort you instead of giving you money
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timboss
Shhh I'm hiding from Monday, bring coffee
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Dating me & posting me ain't enough. I wanna be with you on your driver's license.
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I'm amazing! Everyday I turn water into coffee
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JamieFlower
Me wondering how I've managed to spend all my money when we're only half way through the month
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RoseKiss
The older I get, the more getting home from work seems to be the highlight of my day...
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Me the night before a shift wishing that the power would fail at my work so i can have a day off
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Ever get really excited to finally have some time off, but then just end up spending the entire day like this...
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There's a very good chance that I'm probably sleeping
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Adult life is spending every Sunday wishing that you didn't have to go to work the next day
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Staying up late always seems like a great idea until you set your alarm and realize you only have a couple hours until you need to be up for work
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