Similar to I wish I spoke idiot

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Mike-Ross
I miss the good ole days when bills didn't have my name on them.
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Mike-Ross
Spending money on disappointing food is a different type of pain.
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- humor
Mike-Ross
I never met a problem i couldn't make worse.
Mike-Ross
Every day i wake up wanting to be nice, Then people ruin it for me.
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Mike-Ross
Once upon a time, I was young, fun and semi-sane. Then i joined facebook and met all of you
Mike-Ross
If you call me on speaker phone, remember that is a huge mistake for you
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Mike-Ross
You call it coffee. I call it my emotional support beverage.
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waterbaby
Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.
Mike-Ross
I'm proud of myself for not being fake, I'm difficult sometimes and have a few screws loose but I'm 100% me.
daisydoll
Does anyone else check their facebook like the morning paper?
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daisydoll
Yesterday I did nothing. Today I'm finishing what I started today.
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daisydoll
The rich get richer, the lazy live for free, the middle class continue to pay for it all. Follow me for more reality checks
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daisydoll
I thought growing old would take longer.
daisydoll
I wish facebook would notify me when someone unfriends me so i could like it
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daisydoll
I'm here in body but not mind...my mind is in bed where my body wishes it could be
daisydoll
The best part of waking up...is still a mystery to me
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daisydoll
Time to get up and get going. Today's bad decisions aren't going to make themself
daisydoll
I'm not bothered by my age, I just don't like all of the side effects.
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Mike-Ross
Work can't stress you out if you just don't go in...
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Mike-Ross
Dear 8 hours sleep, i miss you so much.
Mike-Ross
I stress about stress before there's even stress to stress about.
Mike-Ross
Hardest thing ever: controlling your laughter at serious times
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Mike-Ross
Warning: my mouth is a bit like a magician's hat...you just never know what's gonna come out of it.
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Mike-Ross
When I text "interesting" this how i be looking
Mike-Ross
If we're in a relationship, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt
Mike-Ross
POV: Your girlfriend is on her mood swings
Mike-Ross
Boyfriend: you're beautiful
Mike-Ross
Texts like this
Mike-Ross
Me and my friend before making a bad decision
Mike-Ross
Did I lock the door? I have to go back
Mike-Ross
I'm 35 but my back in 57. My knee? She turns 73 on Tuesday
Mike-Ross
Me overthinking every single thing I do or say
Mike-Ross
Behind every crazy woman is a man who made her that way
Mike-Ross
You never know what you have until...you clean your room
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Mike-Ross
Sometimes you've just got to be a bit anti-social at work
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Mike-Ross
Some people will just cause work drama for the sake of it, as if they don't actually have a job they should be getting on with.
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Mike-Ross
You ever had suck a bad day at work that you just came home and sat like this until you calmed down
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Mike-Ross
Do you ever sit at work after a stressful day and just think to yourself...i need to get out of here.
Mike-Ross
When you get to work and your colleague who is always late is actually there before you
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- work meme
Mike-Ross
Jobs are important, but nothing is more important than your family
Mike-Ross
Me trying to find my favorite colleague so i can tell them all the drama that i just overheard
Mike-Ross
Me after playing detective
Pixlove
Asked My Girl Out On 29th February Only Have To Celebrate Anniversary Every 4 Years
Pixlove
I Plan To Sleep Anytime I Get A Day Off
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Pixlove
I Dont Always Tolerate Stupid People
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Pixlove
Funny Dogs Being Dogs
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- dogs
Pixlove
Me As Soon As I Get Home
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Pixlove
When Youre Having A Rough Day But Trying To Stay Positive
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- animals

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