My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb

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My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb

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Humor May Cleanse You I could gopher some coffee Women have 4 types of showers Where do spiders go shopping? On The Web She's the neighborhood cat lady Told my supervisor that I'm coming to work on Halloween as a ghost This witch can be bribed with chocolate If you want to lose weight you don't need exercise or diet. I won't tell anyone I won the lottery but there will be hints It's another day in paradise, minus the paradise. When you take 17 selfies and still look like this My dad made this for when his girlfriend won't pick a restaurant My toxic trait is telling people I'm down for anything. I'm just sitting here with my onion rings How often do you exercise? Laugh Until You’re Spooked: 10 Funny Halloween Memes You’ll Love 10 Epic Memes to Make You Laugh Out Loud (Seriously, You Might Snort!) That "no work tomorrow" sleep be hitting different Me after arguing with the whole house Me after realizing I can make Christmas spooky Baby, I am Halloween Just standing here...waiting on Halloween Me when a slight breeze rolls through This is Halloween! When you find someone who loves Halloween just as much as you do I don't smile before coffee Laughter in the Office: Funny Work Memes to Survive the 9-to-5 I wish facebook would notify me when people delete me. I stress about stress before there's even stress to stress about According to doctors, the symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying and napping alot. If only losing weight was as easy as losing my keys, temper or even my mind. I would be so skinny I either cry or turn into a psychopath when I'm mad. There is no inbetween I'm getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach My level of maturity depends on who I'm with Me when they take long to reply to my texts The calendar may say August but my heart says pumpkin spice
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